Golf Phrases: Funny Golf Slang and Terms
Since a round of golf can routinely last over four hours, there is plenty of time for conversation among golfers, often filled with golf jargon.
Once golf play begins with a tee shot, playing partners will use slang, golf shot terms, golf sayings, and use direct quotes to entertain and enrich their enjoyment of the round.
These funny golf sayings make time on the course more enjoyable, regardless of how the golf is played.
Even when players are holding the club over the golf ball, players will frequently spice up their round with some good-natured ribbing, even if it is just between two golfers.
In our article highlighting golf terms and phrases such as slang, general terms, and quotes, we take a lighthearted look at the comedic side of the great game, providing ammunition for the next time you hit the course and want to make fun of a golfer’s playing ability.
What You Will Learn In This Post
CHAPTER 1
Golf Slang
Easily the most enjoyable thing to say on the course is a few slang words that represent a shorthand that only other golfers know.
With our own form of communication, using slang can help create bonds that make the time on the links some of your favorite moments of the year.
Here’s a handful of slang terms to use next time you play a round.
Sticks
If you ever hear a playing partner use the slang term of “sticks” then know that means golf clubs.
For frequent golfers, using the phrase “sticks” is relatively common, especially when they are playing poorly and their golf swing is out of sync.
Chunk
A chunked shot is a bad shot occurring when the golfer strikes the ground behind the golf ball first.
Rather than hitting the ball cleanly, the golfer experiences diminished power as the divot forces the ball to carry poorly and well short of its intended target.
Mastering proper golf technique can help prevent chunked shots and improve overall performance on the course.
Air Mail
Another fun slang term for the golf course is “air mail.” When a golfer hits a poor shot over the green, then they “air mailed” the putting surface.
Whether it comes from misjudging the distance or the strength of the wind behind the poor shot, “air mailing” can ruin a hole and cause a major dent in the scorecard.
Developing a solid golf strategy can help golfers avoid mistakes like air mailing the green and improve their overall score.
Gimme
A “gimme” is when the golfer faces short putts of only a few feet on the course and chooses to pick up their golf balls rather than putt out the hole.
Although a gimme is not a putt, the golfer scores the imagined golf stroke as if it were a made putt. In match play, a conceded putt routinely would be called a “gimme” in less formal settings on the course.
Understanding golf etiquette, including when to concede putts, is essential for maintaining the spirit of the game.
Dance Floor
The phrase, “dance floor” refers to the putting green.
When you hear one of your playing partners say, “I’m going to use a 7-iron to get this ball on the dance floor,” they are hoping to reach the green with their entry shot.
Familiarizing yourself with the golf course layout can help you make better club selections and improve your chances of hitting the dance floor.
Dog Track
When a golf course has seen better days, players will call the course, “a dog track.” Any rundown course in need of serious restoration will be commonly referred to as “a dog track.”
When you see greens that have bare spots, fairways that are not maintained and frequently mowed, or uneven tee boxes, you can rest assured that someone has used this derogatory golf term in reference to the course.
Proper golf course maintenance is crucial for providing a quality playing experience and preventing courses from becoming dog tracks.
Fried Egg
When a lands in the bunker and buries itself with just a small area of the ball exposed, the term for this unfortunate circumstance is a “fried egg” lie.
While the term is relatively self-explanatory, for those that need more clarity, this particular situation where the ball sits in the sand looks like a fried egg from above.
Improving your bunker play can help you escape fried egg lies and save strokes on your scorecard.
Winter Rules
A catchphrase that gained traction from the movie Caddyshack, “winter rules” is slang for improving your lie due to the harsh conditions caused by the cold weather of the season.
In Caddyshack, one of the characters consistently improved his lie on the course citing “winter rules” as the reason. For beginner golfers and slower playing golfers, playing by winter rules can speed up the round.
CHAPTER 2
Golf Terms
Although not as much fun as slang, these golf terms are necessary to learning the finer details of the game, especially if you are taking lessons with a seasoned coach.
Understanding golf rules, including when winter rules apply, can help you navigate challenging playing conditions.
Here are several of the most common golf terms you’ll hear when playing.
Birdie
When a golfer scores one less than par on a hole, then they score a “birdie.” For serious golfers, placing birdies on their scorecard helps reduce the penalty incurred by bogeys.
Mastering the art of scoring in golf, including making birdies, can significantly improve your overall performance.
Albatross
When a golfer scores 3-under par on a hole, such as when a golfer scores a 2 on a par 5, then they scored an “albatross.”
Although extremely rare, professional golfers occasionally hole out shots from the fairway on a reachable par 5, achieving an “albatross” on a hole.
Achieving an albatross is one of the rarest and most celebrated golf achievements.
Eagle
An “eagle” is when the golfer posts a score that is 2-under par.
A hole-in-one on a par 3, for example, is a birdie on the scorecard because the golfer completed the hole in one stroke when par is three strokes.
Bogey
A bogey is when a golfer goes 1 over the listed par for a hole. Regardless of what the par is for a hole, shooting 1-over constitutes a bogey.
Understanding golf scoring, including the impact of bogeys, is essential for tracking your performance.
Short Grass
Referring to the fairway, the term found its name due to the short length of the grass in the middle of a hole.
When a player hits tee shots into the fairway, you’ll routinely hear this term used by a weekend warrior in your group on the golf course.
Effective fairway management can help you consistently hit tee shots into the short grass and improve your overall game.
Fade
When a ball gradually moves left to right that shot is called a fade. Not to be confused with a “slice,” where the ball moves extremely to the right, a fade utilizes more control from the golfer.
Rarely would a fade be considered a poor shot, although a slice is routinely considered to be a bad shot. (Here’s our guide on How to Fix a Slice)
Mastering shot shaping, including hitting a fade, can give you greater control over your ball flight.
Recommended: How to Hit a Fade
Draw
For a right-handed golfer, a draw is a golf shot that comes back to their side of the course. Moving from right to left, the draw also allows golfers more control when the ball hits the green with minimal side spin.
Understanding ball flight and how to control it with a draw can enhance your accuracy on the course.
Mulligan
Golfers who hit a poor shot will sometimes take a “mulligan” and hit a second ball without taking a penalty.
For example, if a golfer mis-hits a bad drive off the first tee, they can use a mulligan to re-tee a new ball and hit another shot with the driver’s club head.
In corporate tournaments, mulligans can be purchased for a team or individual player, giving them more chances to correct their errant shots, while raising more money for charity.
Match Play
A golf format involving two golfers, match-style play goes hole by hole with a winner determined by the low score after both players finish. If the golfers card the same score, then no player wins the hole.
The winning golfer claims their title if they are leading by more holes than remain on the course. Match play is a popular golf competition format that tests players’ skills on a hole-by-hole basis.
Executive Golf Course
Rather than having a full 18-hole course, an executive layout offers a reduction in number of holes and length of each hole to encourage a shorter playing time.
For golfers that struggle to find the time to play a full round, an executive design can fulfill their desire to play golf without sacrificing the majority of their day.
Executive courses are a unique golf course design that offers a quicker playing experience without sacrificing the enjoyment of the game.
Ready Golf
When a golf course employee tells players to practice “ready golf,” they want golfers to play golf quickly so they don’t cause a backup on any golf hole.
At regular golf courses, rounds can last over four hours, so if the group is not playing “ready golf” and simply enjoying the fresh air with no regard to other playing groups, the round can lengthen causing long delays.
Practicing ready golf helps maintain a good pace of play, ensuring that rounds are completed in a timely manner.
Gold Tee Markers
If you play a course with gold tees, then they represent the championship-level tees for a golf course.
Tees designated with gold or black regularly denote the preferred way to play the course for advanced golfers.
Gold tee markers are often found on the championship tee box, challenging advanced golfers to play the course at its full length.
Tempo
When a coach gives out golf tips, they routinely encourage their students to find “tempo” with each golf shot. No matter if it is a drive or a short game shot, tempo can help deliver consistent results.
Regardless of whether it is a short putt that demands a smooth putting stroke, or you are hitting shots from a longer distance, finding the tempo helps keep your swing in sync — providing reliability that you can count on when playing golf.
Finding the right swing rhythm can help golfers maintain a consistent tempo and improve their overall performance.
Pin-High
When a ball hits the green evenly with the hole, but just to the right or left of the flag, then you’ve hit the ball “pin-high.”
Golfers strive to land the ball with the right distance to the pin for better putting opportunities to score either birdie or par.
Hitting a pin-high approach shot can set up better putting opportunities and improve your chances of scoring.
CHAPTER 3
Quotes
For golfers looking for inspiration in finding more success when attempting a very short putt, shots from a tough sand bunker, or how to overcome a terrible shot, some of the world’s great leaders and writers have shared their wisdom and inspiration through golf phrases and quotes to help weekend warriors take their game to the next level.
Lee Trevino
If you were to seek out the funniest golf quotes of all-time, your search would inevitably end with the six-time major winner, Lee Trevino.
Born in north Texas, Trevino grew up on a local course near his home, working the range at a young age before moving to caddying, and eventually, hustling the club’s members out of their 19th hole money.
Trevino’s wit is as sharp as his golf game. If you look at his Wikipedia page, you won’t be surprised to find an entire section labeled “Humor.”
Easily his most infamous quote came after Trevino was struck by lightning at the 1975 Western Open.
When asked by a reporter what he would do if he was out on the course during a storm, Trevino quipped, “In case of a thunderstorm, stand in the middle of the fairway and hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can’t hit a 1 iron.”
Other popular quotes from Trevino include:
- “My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch.”
- “You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.”
- “Only bad golfers are lucky. They’re the ones bouncing balls off trees, curbs, turtles and cars. Good golfers have bad luck. When you hit the ball straight, a funny bounce is bound to be unlucky.”
- “Pressure is when you play for five dollars a hole with only two in your pocket.”
Lee Trevino, a true golf legend, is known for his sharp wit and memorable quotes that have left a lasting impact on the sport.
Gary Player
Another legendary golfer known for the sharpness of his mind is South African Gary Player.
Winner of a whopping nine major championships, Player continues to hold clinics, write books, and play the great game well into his 80s.
Gary Player, a golf icon, continues to inspire golfers around the world with his wisdom and dedication to the sport.
YouTube videos of Player rack up millions of views each year for his golf knowledge and his entertaining style of presentation.
Some of Player’s most famous quotations about golf include:
- “It’s a marriage. If I had to choose between my wife and my putter, well, I’d miss her.”
- “The ideal build for a golfer would be strong hands, big forearms, thin neck, big thighs and a flat chest. He’d look like Popeye.”
- “Golf asks something of a man. It makes one loathe mediocrity.”
- “Golf is a puzzle without an answer. I’ve played the game for 40 years and I still haven’t the slightest idea how to play.”
- “If one isn’t prepared to suffer during adversities, I don’t really see how he can be successful (in golf).”
- “The more I practice, the luckier I get.”
CHAPTER 4
Top Ten All-Time Golf Quotes
Here are our choices for the top-ten all-time golf quotes:
1. Arnold Palmer: “I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone’s golf game: It’s called an eraser.”
2. Author P.J. Rourke: “Golf combines two favorite American pastimes; taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.”
3. Pastor Billy Graham: “The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.”
4. Tiger Woods: “No matter how good you get you can always get better and that’s the exciting part.”
5. Bob Hope: “If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.”
6. Ben Hogan: “The most important shot in golf is the next one.”
7. Sam Snead: “”If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they’d starve to death.”
8. Chris Perry: “The worst club in my bag is my brain.”
9. Jack Nicklaus: “I think I fail a bit less than everyone else.”
10. Mark Twain: “Golf is a good walk spoiled.”
BONUS FOR BEGINNERS!!!
Golf Course Features
Bunkers
Ah, the dreaded bunker! A bunker is essentially a sandy pit of despair designed to challenge golfers and add a sprinkle of difficulty to the game.
These sneaky depressions can be found lurking on fairways, greens, and even in the rough, just waiting to gobble up wayward golf shots.
There are various types of bunkers, including the classic sand trap, the treacherous pot bunker, and the strategically placed fairway bunker.
Navigating bunkers requires a delicate touch and a bit of finesse. Golfers often employ techniques like the sand shot or the bunker shot to escape these sandy snares and continue their quest for par.
So, next time you find your golf ball nestled in a bunker, remember to channel your inner escape artist and get back on track!
Fairways
The fairway is the golfer’s highway, a pristine stretch of short grass that lies between the tee box and the green. This is where you aim to land your tee shots, hoping for a smooth ride to the hole.
Fairways are typically made of lush grass, but in some cases, you might encounter fairways composed of sand or dirt, adding a bit of variety to your round.
Fairways can be as wide as a football field or as narrow as a tightrope, and they often feature obstacles like bunkers, trees, or water hazards to keep things interesting.
The fairway is your friend, providing a safe and playable area to hit your shots. So, aim for the fairway and enjoy the journey to the green!
Greens
The green is the golfer’s final destination, a smooth, grassy oasis where you putt the ball to complete the hole.
Greens are meticulously maintained to ensure a smooth and even surface, allowing for precise putting.
This critical part of the golf course demands accuracy and control, as even the slightest miscalculation can send your ball veering off course.
Greens come in all shapes and sizes, from flat and straightforward to sloped and tiered, often featuring obstacles like bunkers or water hazards to keep you on your toes.
Mastering the green is key to lowering your score and achieving golfing glory. So, take a deep breath, line up your putt, and let the magic happen!
Golf Equipment
Golf Clubs
Golf clubs are the trusty tools of the trade, each designed to help you navigate the course and conquer every golf hole.
A golf club consists of a club head attached to a shaft, and they come in various types, including drivers, irons, wedges, and putters.
Each type of golf club is tailored for a specific type of golf shot, ensuring you have the right tool for every situation.
The club head, typically made of metal or titanium, is engineered to strike the golf ball with precision and power.
The shaft, made of graphite or steel, provides the flexibility and control needed to execute your golf swing.
Golfers carry a variety of golf clubs in their bags, selecting the perfect one for each shot based on factors like distance, trajectory, and spin.
So, whether you’re teeing off with a driver, hitting a chip shot with a wedge, or sinking a short putt with a putter, your golf clubs are your trusty companions on the course.
Choose wisely, swing confidently, and watch your golf balls soar!
Final Thoughts
Using golf phrases on the golf course is another way to bond with your friends and playing partners.
While there are dozens of great golf expressions in the golfing community, we could not get every slang term and memorable quote on this list.
But the more you play the local golf courses in your area, you’ll find that you can learn new golf phrases with each playing partner you come across on your golfing journey.